How To Deal With Negative People

Do you have any friends or colleagues who are negative? If so, you’ll know they aren’t the most enjoyable people to be around. Negative people can be real downers in any conversation. No matter what you say, they have a way of spinning things in a negative direction. Some negative people can be so negative that it feels draining just being around them.

 Rather than be affected by others’ negative energy, consciously deal with it. Here are 9 tips to deal with negative people in your life:

1) Don’t get into an argument

One of the most important things I learned is not to debate with a negative person. A negative person likely has very staunch views and isn’t going to change that just because of what you said. Whatever you say, he/she can find 10 different reasons to back up his/her viewpoint. The discussion will just swirl into more negativity, and you pull yourself down in the process. You can give constructive comments, and if the person rebutts with no signs of backing down, don’t engage further.

2) Empathize with them

Have you ever been annoyed by something before, then have someone tell you to “relax”? How did you feel? Did you relax as the person suggested or did you feel even more worked up?

From my experience, people who are negative (or upset for that matter) benefit more from an empathetic ear than suggestions/solutions on what he/she should do. By helping them to address their emotions, the solutions will automatically come to them (it’s always been inside them anyway).

3) Lend a helping hand

Some people complain as a way of crying for help. They may not be conscious of it though, so their comments come across as complaints rather than requests. Take the onus to lend a helping hand. Just a simple “Are you okay?” or “Is there anything I can do to help you?” can do wonders.

4) Stick to light topics

Some negative people are triggered by certain topics. Take for example: One of my friends sinks into a self-victimizing mode whenever we talk about his work. No matter what I say (or don’t say), he’ll keep complaining once we talk about work.

Our 1st instinct with negative people should be to help bring them to a more positive place (i.e. steps #2 and #3). But if it’s apparent the person is stuck in his/her negativity, the unhappiness may be too deeply rooted to address in a one-off conversation, or for you to help him/her unravel it. Bring in a new topic to lighten the mood. Simple things like new movies, daily occurrences, common friends, make for light conversation. Keep it to areas the person feels positive towards.

5) Ignore the negative comments

One way to help the negative person “get it” is to ignore the negative comments. If he/she goes into a negative swirl, ignore or give a simple “I see” or “Ok” reply. On the other hand, when he/she is being positive, reply in affirmation and enthusiasm. Do this often and soon he/she will know positivity pays off. He/she will adjust to be more positive accordingly.

6) Praise the person for the positive things

Negative people aren’t just negative to others. They’re also negative to themselves. If you already feel negative around them, imagine how they must feel all the time. What are the things the person is good at? What do you like about the person? Recognize the positive things and praise him/her for it. He/she will be surprised at first and might reject the compliment, but on the inside he/she will feel positive about it. That’s the first seed of positivity you’re planting in him/her and it’ll bloom in the long-term.

7) Hang out in 3’s or more people

Having someone else in the conversation works wonders in easing the load. In a 1-1 communication, all the negativity will be directed towards you. With someone else in the conversation, you don’t have to bear the full brunt of the negativity. This way you can focus more on doing steps #1 (Empathizing) and #2 (Helping the person).

8) Be responsible for your reaction

Whether the person is negative or not, ultimately you’re the one who is perceiving the person is negative. When you recognize that, actually the negativity is the product of your lens. Take responsibility for your perceptions. For every trait, you can interpret it in a positive and a negative manner. Learn to see the goodness of the person than the negative. It may be tough initially, but once you cultivate the skill, it becomes second nature.

9) Reduce contact with them / Avoid them

If all else fails, reduce contact with them or avoid them altogether. If it’s a good friend, let him/her know of the severity of the issue and work it out where possible. It’s not healthy to spend too much time with people who drain you. Your time is precious, so spend it with people who have positive effects on you.

Healthy Snack Ideas

The aroma hits you as soon as you walk through the doors of any movie theater…popcorn!

For many people, a trip to the movies isn’t complete without a big tub of buttery popcorn and a giant cup of soda. But if you don’t choose carefully, that treat could be scarier than the next blockbuster horror flick! With a little planning, you can still enjoy a yummy snack that doesn’t wreak havoc on your good eating habits.

In theory, popcorn should be low in calories and high in fiber—a healthy, whole grain snack. And it is when you air pop your own at home. But everything changes when it's made at the theater and becomes a greasy and oil-soaked mess covered in artery-clogging butter or margarine.

A few years ago, when the Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI) reported that movie theater popcorn was full of unhealthy fat, the industry immediately made changes, switching from coconut oil to healthier oils, such as peanut. Over the years, however, some chains have switched back to coconut oil to save money and improve flavor.

But just how bad could a tub of popcorn be? On average, a large popcorn (which contains 20 cups) boasts a mind-boggling 100 grams of fat—the equivalent of more than six fast food hamburgers. With about 1,300 calories, that large popcorn packs almost a full day’s supply of calories for the average dieter.

If movie theater popcorn is a must-have, stick with a kid-sized serving and forgo the added butter or margarine. Avoid the larger sizes completely, even if it seems like a steal. Moving up to the medium serving from the small size costs only pennies more, but adds about 500 more calories and two days worth of saturated fat. Ouch! Think you can get away with buying large and sharing? Think again. One study conducted at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign found that people who were given a large bucket of popcorn ate 50 percent more than those who were given a medium-sized bag. When asked to estimate how much they had eaten, participants thought they only ate as much as those with a smaller bag. This is one of many studies proving that if there’s food in front of us, we’l eat it without thinking. Those giant chocolate bars and boxes of candy at the counter are also bad news. While you might kid yourself into thinking that you won’t eat the whole thing, chances are that once you're munching away in the dark, you’ll mindlessly consume the entire box without blinking. If you absolutely have to have a treat from the candy counter, choose the smallest sizes. They offer built in portion control and fewer overall calories. Check out the following chart to see how your movie favorites compare. Pay particular attention to the sizes, which vary from two to over nine ounces. Theater Food Size Calories Fat Sno Caps 3.1 oz box 300 15 g Hot dog Medium (2 oz) 305 5 g Mike & Ike 3 oz box 320 0 g Junior Mints 3 oz box 360 7 g Milk Duds 3 oz box 370 12 g Gummi Bears 3.5 oz bag 390 0 g Raisinets 3.5 oz bag 400 16 g Soft pretzel Large (5 oz) 480 5 g Starburst 4.4 oz 480 11 g Goobers 3.5 oz box 500 35 g Twizzlers 6 oz bag 570 4 g M&M's 5.3 oz bag 750 32 g Skittles 6.5 oz bag 765 9 g Peanut M&M's 5.3 oz bag 790 40 g Dots 9.2 oz box 850 0 g Cheese nachos Large (4 oz) 1,100 60 g Reese's Pieces 8 oz bag 1,160 60 g

One way to enjoy at treat at the movies without destroying your waistline is to bring your own snacks from home. Yes, this is discouraged by most theater owners because they make a huge profit at the concession stand. However, all theaters have different policies, and some even allow you to bring food from outside vendors (such as restaurants or shops in the same mall or shopping center). Find out the policy at your favorite theater, and be prepared to lose your snacks to an angry employee if you get caught breaking the rules.

Here are some healthy alternatives you can bring from home to munch on:

• Bottled water or 100% fruit juice
• Trail mix, made with nuts and dried fruit
• Dry cereal (watch the sugar content in these)
• String cheese
• Air-popped popcorn, flavored with Parmesan cheese, chili pepper, or garlic powder
• Whole Grain crackers, graham crackers, or rice crackers
• Baked potato chips or tortilla chips
• Bananas, grapes, raisins, or other no-mess fruit
• 2-3 miniature dark chocolate bars

The best way to avoid temptation at the theater is to eat a balanced meal beforehand—lean protein, whole grains, veggies and healthy fats will keep you satisfied for several hours. (Sorry, but the concession's pizza, nachos and hot dogs don't fit the bill of a healthy meal.)

Going to the movies is a social experience—and that means eating for many people. But you don’t have to miss out on the fun just because you’re watching what your diet. By bringing your own portion-controlled snacks from home or choosing carefully at the candy counter, the only things you’ll be missing are the inches you'll lose from your waist.

The Beach Strength & Conditioning Workout

The only downside to spending a few quiet vacation days in a remote beach town is the distance it puts between you and your personal fitness. Scenic resort areas usually lack state-of-the-art training facilities and you’ll need to improvise if you’re going to stay fit away from your gym and trainer. Before surrendering to the summer sun and its beachfront barbeques, utilizing the space around you can help supplement a more extensive workout. 

The plan combines both strength and anaerobic fitness training to be performed without equipment but with the challenges an environment like an isolated beach can provide.

WARM-UP

A warm up is necessary, even in the heat, to increase blood flow and oxygen to the muscles. This increases flexibility, decreases injury, and decreases fatigue. Increase hydration and mineral intake when working out in the heat/sun.

10-20 reps each
Push-ups (on your knees)
Squat to Stand
Reverse Lunge
Side Plank 30 sec each
Hip Bridge 30 sec each

STRENGTH TRAINING

All these things will provide a different stimulus to your muscles. This workout will definitely keep your strength levels and fitness tuned until you get back into the gym.

Body Weight Exercises: When finished, rest for two minutes and then repeat series.
Squats 1x20
Lunges 1x10 each leg
Push-ups 1x10-20 (Hold for 1 min)
Crunch 1x40
Close Grip Push-up 1x10
Toe Raises 1x20
Wave Squat 1x20 (3 quarter squats followed by a full squat)
Scissor Kicks 1x40
Supermans 1x20
Single Leg Hip Extensions 2x10

CONDITIONING/FITNESS

The sand provides an unstable surface which will challenge your nervous system, as well as add resistance as you sink into the sand.  You will feel the added difficulty in the first couple of reps.

Option 1:

1) Sprint 5 yards in sand then back to start, then 10 yards, then 15 covering 60 yards total.  Try to do this in less than 20 seconds 2-3 reps
2) Repeat -this time back peddling in between sprints.  IE:  sprint 5 yards and back peddle back, etc. 2-3 reps
3) Repeat-this time shuffling between sprints.

Option 2:

1) Start with 10 squat jumps in the sand.  Immediately proceed to 10 push-ups.  Immediately proceed to 10 sit-ups. Repeat for 9 reps each then 8 then 7 and so on until you get to 1!

Option 3: Do these drills in waist deep water for 20-30 yards each. Repeat when finished.

1) High knee run.  2-3 sets
2) Butt Kicks. 2-3 sets
3) Squat jumps 10-20 reps
4) Backwards run 2-3 sets
5) Lateral Shuffle 2-3 sets

 Just like quitting smoking, cutting out sugar is easier said than done because of its addictive nature, according to psychologist Alexis Conason. When you consume sugar in cake, cookies, ice cream, sodas or yogurt, it activates the same brain regions as other addictive substances like cocaine. Going cold turkey is the best approach to break the addiction and start improving your health.

Sugar in Your Diet

Before weaning yourself off of sugar, look at your diet to identify where sugar hides in all the different foods and beverages your consume. Read food labels and look not only for the word sugar, but also for sucrose, glucose, dextrose, fructose, high-fructose corn syrup, honey, evaporated cane juice, fruit juice concentrates, molasses and agave syrup. Sugar is not only present in sweets, desserts and sugary drinks, but is added to tomato sauce, bread, ketchup, mustard and salad dressings. Get rid of all these sugar-containing foods.

Go Cold Turkey

Some people choose to gradually reduce their sugar intake over a period of a few weeks, but you can accelerate the transition and get rid of your sugar cravings more quickly by going cold turkey. Decide on a date in the coming week or month and prepare yourself mentally. Try not to focus too much on the fact that you won't be able to eat sugar again to avoid the "last supper" effect or uncontrolled binges. Instead, think of your new sugar-free diet in a positive way, and remind yourself that weaning from sugar will allow you to lose weight, get healthier and break your addiction and cravings.

Avoid Refined Grains

In addition to eliminating sugar-containing foods and beverages, it is a good idea to get rid of refined grains and flours in your diet. Even if the white bread, bagels, crackers, pretzels and many breakfast cereals you select do not have added sugar, the refined starches they contain can easily break down into sugar and increase your blood sugar levels, promoting weight gain and hunger just as easily as sugar. Aim to get your carbohydrates instead from fresh fruits, sweet potato, broccoli, squashes and other vegetables, as well as nuts, natural nut butter, plain milk and yogurt.

Be Prepared

The first few days after weaning yourself off of sugar and refined carbohydrates can be difficult. Be aware that many people experience more cravings, low energy levels, irritability, headaches and dizziness while the body adapts to a sugar-free diet. This transition usually lasts a few days. Drink plenty of water and eat lots of vegetables, fruits, nuts and other healthy foods to alleviate side effects. Once your cravings disappear and your energy levels improve, you will know your body has weaned itself off of sugar. Stay away from sugar to prevent starting a new vicious cycle of sugar addiction.

If you were to read the nutrition labels of most processed food products, you might find that refined sugars and grains top the ingredients list more often than not. The problem is, these refined carbohydrates provide little to no nutritional value. In fact, consuming too many refined carbohydrates has been shown in studies to cause obesity, high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol and diabetes. Perhaps a more accurate nutrition label should include a warning: overconsumption of this product may cause multiple health problems, even death. 

           

Fortunately, you have a choice. You can say “no” to the countless nutrition-less “food-like” products and instead choose whole-food energy sources. “Whole foods … provide critical nutrients whereas refined grains are not only void of nutrients, they set your blood sugar on a roller coaster ride.

Dangerous Duo

Probably the greatest health issue facing modern humans today is obesity. More people are overweight than ever as the consumption of increasingly common processed foods continues to grow. According to the Centers for Disease Control, more than one-third of U.S. adults are obese, the highest percentage in our history.

           

So how did this get started and why is this happening? A large contributor to the problem is our continuing shift from whole grains to refined carbohydrates, specifically refined flour. Humans have been refining grains since at least the Industrial Revolution, favoring white flour and white rice even at the price of lost nutrients.  Refining grains extends their shelf life, precisely because it renders them less nutritious to pests, and makes them easier to digest by removing the fiber that ordinarily slows the release of their sugars.

           

The fiber that would otherwise slow sugar absorption is destroyed as a by-product of food processing. For example, refining corn into sweetener makes it instantly digestible. High fructose corn syrup effectively becomes glucose, which is essentially predigested food. How stomach turning is that? Eating bread made with refined flour or drinking a cola is just a small step away from injecting glucose straight into your blood stream.

           

As far as sugar goes,  there is no point in arguing the difference between high fructose corn syrup and sucrose, commonly known as table sugar. They’re equally bad; they’re both poison in high doses.  Sugar both drives fat storage and makes the brain think it’s hungry, setting up a vicious cycle.

           

Calorie for calorie, sugar causes more insulin resistance in the liver than other foods. Consuming sugar elevates blood glucose levels, then the pancreas has to release more insulin to satisfy the liver’s needs. Heart disease and other health problems will continue to grow as long as the shift towards eating more refined flour and sugar-laden foods continues.

Whole Foods Are Best

Humans are not biologically hardwired to deal with refined carbohydrates. We are however, perfectly designed to digest and extract nutrients from whole-food energy sources, such as whole grains, fruits and vegetables. We have been genetically programmed to consume whole foods because whole foods deliver micronutrients that are critical for keeping the body alive and healthy with sustained energy.

           

In the case of chronic sugar consumption, the body gets confused and insulin production increases, causing too much glucose to be stored as fat. The sugar keeps circulating (in the body), resulting in insulin resistance and inflammation (the core cause of most disease), illness, weight gain and faster aging.

           

However, when we eat whole foods, there is a gradual release of glucose due to the fiber and micronutrient compounds. Eating whole foods helps to minimize inflammatory health issues.

Do you want to stay motivated and disciplined, but find it hard to resist the urge to skip workouts, or eat junk food? Well, you may be suffering from a lack of PMA, or Positive Mental Attitude. Below are 5 tips that will help in keeping a positive mental attitude while reaching your fitness goals.

What You Think – You Become 
If you spend time thinking about what you want to achieve you are more likely to get it than if you don’t, right? A great start is to imagine what you want to achieve with your body. Think about what your body will look like. Imagine how you will feel living in this body. Think about the response you will get from others, and about the confidence you will have. If you are having trouble imagining your ideal body then find a photo in a magazine and cut it out. Hang it up and look at it each day, knowing that you will look like that. Stay focused on the goal.  

The Power of Support 
Surround yourself with others who are striving for health and fitness goals. Gym and health clubs are a great resource for like-minded people. The web lets you connect with people all over the world. Develop support networks of family and friends who understand your desire to change, and can be a source of support and encouragement when you might be feeling weak. Provide support and encouragement to others and before you know it you will have the support and encouragement of those around you.

Positive Exposure
Maybe you are not a naturally positive person. Maybe you tend to see life as half-empty. Take time to read positive books and articles. Anthony Robins has made a career out of preaching positivity. Pick up the world-famous book “Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude”. Read inspirational quotes. Take time to read health and fitness articles on the web. Over time you will find that you begin to reframe your life in more positive terms. “Problems” will become “opportunities”. “Setbacks” will become “challenges”. Your language will begin to change, and limitations will disappear.

Know When It Is Time To Change
If you are not feeling especially enthusiastic about your next workout, or do not want to see another chicken breast on your plate, then you might be suffering from burnout. Negative thoughts will often arise when one is in need of change in their routine. Maybe taking a day or two off from the gym, or allowing yourself to have a special meal will re-energize your body as well as add some more positive associations to your fitness plan. Negative thinking, especially when it is not your normal thought process, is usually a sign that it is time to make some changes. Listen to your thoughts, as they can be a gateway to the mind!

Recognize Your Progress
It is difficult to feel positive if you do not see progress.  Measure your fitness progress, and recognize your accomplishments. If you were able to get in one more workout this week than last, you are progressing. If the scale changes in the right direction, then know that you are on your way to becoming the body you imagined being. If you have a week that did not go well, then look at what went wrong and know that you have learned a valuable lesson that will help you in future weeks. Track your progress knowing that nobody has success all the time. Those who make it to their goal are able to see setbacks as learning opportunities. Take time to review your progress, and let it be positive motivation propelling you toward your goals.

While counting calories may help you lose weight, to achieve total health and optimum fitness you’ll need to look beyond the calories, and recognize that not all calories are created equal. If you’re looking to see some real results in your fitness and wellness journey, keep reading because today I’m taking you through this comprehensive guide to mastering your macros…

1. What’s a Macro?

Before you can track your macros, you need to know what they are exactly. Well, ‘macro’ is short for macronutrient and it refers to the process of counting the exact amounts of carbohydrates, protein, and fats you consume in any given day.
It’s a practice that’s been popular amongst elite bodybuilders and physique competitors for ages and has become quite popular with crossfit competitors and those following a paleo diet in recent years. Don’t confuse macronutrient (fats, carbs, protein) with micronutrients (vitamins and minerals). While not talked about as much, technically alcohol is a fourth macronutrient because it contains calories, and all calories come from macronutrients.

2. Protein

There are so many diets and nutritional regimens out there these days that put the focus on protein, and there is some good reason behind this. An adequate protein intake can build muscle or prevent muscle loss if you’re not getting enough calories, it controls your hunger and keeps you feeling fuller for longer and it requires more energy from the body to digest when compared with other macronutrients, which means it burns more calories through digestion.
The best sources of protein is meat, dairy, fish, eggs, and protein shakes and the amount of protein you should be consuming daily all comes down to your goals and your lean body mass (that is your total weight minus your body fat percentage).

3. Fats

It wasn’t long ago that the health world waged a war on fat, and low-calorie diets seemed like the smart way to eat healthy. Thankfully, we’ve since learned that there are good fats and bad fats, but when it comes to counting macros, fats means both the good and the bad (saturated, unsaturated and cholesterol.)
Fat is the second macronutrient and we need this essential nutrient to absorb vitamins and minerals, help with brain function, regulate hormones and many other important bodily functions. You can get fats from a lot of places, among the most common are meats, nuts, nut butters, oils, fatty fish and avocados. As with protein, the amount you need depends on your fitness goals, weight and body fat percentage.

4. Carbohydrates

Carbohydrates round out the three essential macronutrients and while for a while carbs were the enemy, they have their place in any diet. Carbohydrates are stored in the brain, blood, liver and muscles as glycogen and our body uses them for essential energy.
Carbs are easy to find and sources include fruit, vegetables, grains, processed foods/drinks and pretty much anything that you get a strong craving for. There’s a pretty wide range with it comes to the question “How many carbs do I need?”.  Again, your target amount will depend on your fitness goals, weight and body fat percentage.

5. Macros vs. Calories

One of the most confusing parts of mastering your macros is understanding the differences as well as the relationship between calories and macros. As I stated, all calories come from macros, which means, each macronutrient has a certain number of calories. We measure macros in grams, so one gram of protein has 4 calories, one gram of carbs has 4 calories, one gram of fat has 9 calories and one gram of alcohol has 7 calories.
To test this out, take a nutritional label, multiply the grams of protein by 4, the total grams of fat by 9 and the total carbs by 4 and you should get roughly the total calories per serving (give or take a few calories due to rounding.) While counting calories alone will help achieve weight loss goals, macros are the key to a balanced approach to weight loss and optimal physical health.

6. How Do You Count Macros?

So now that you understand exactly what macros are and why they are important, let’s talk about how you count them. This is the process of counting the amount of fats, carbs, and protein in each item that goes into your body. And that means everything. When you’re eating something that has a nutritional label, this can be done pretty easily with a little math. Count the total fats, total carbs and protein, but be careful to mind the serving size, if you eat an entire bag/box of anything you’ve probably got some multiplying to do because most products contain multiple servings.
For foods that don’t come with a label (i.e., fruits, vegetables, meat, etc) you will need to use a food scale to find out the portion size and then look up nutritional info online and do your additions. Measuring all your food using a scale may sound pretty obsessive, but you’d be surprised how many extra calories come from overfilling measuring cups and spoons each day.

7. Should You Count Your Macros?

This is really the ultimate question and it’s entirely up to the individual and if they feel that it will be beneficial for their fitness goals. There are definitely pros and cons to counting and not counting, and if you’re not already getting the picture, counting every single item you eat and using a food scale to weight all your portions is downright tedious. The other extreme of counting macros is that it can turn dangerous, and can even lead to unhealthy food stigma and the development of eating disorders.
There are advantages of course so you may want to consider taking on this endeavour if you are just shy of your weightless goals and looking to lose the last stubborn pounds; or if your body signals are out of whack and you find yourself craving chips, chocolate and ice cream late at night. If however, you’re already neurotic about weight loss and you have a tendency to stress about it, you’re just getting into fitness and weight loss, or your goal is to just be healthy, I would suggest not counting your macros.